“There are moments in our lives when we find ourselves at a crossroads; afraid, confused, without a roadmap. The choices we make in those moments will define us for the rest of our days. Of course, when faced with the unknown, most of us prefer to turn around and go back. But once in a while people push onto something better. Something found just beyond the pain of going it alone, and just beyond the bravery and courage it takes to let someone in, or to give someone a second chance. Something beyond the quiet persistence of a dream. Because it’s only when you’re tested that you discover who you truly are. And it’s only when you’re tested that you discover who you can be. The person you want to be does exist, somewhere on the other side of hard work, faith and belief. And beyond the heartache and fear of what lies ahead.”
It seems like only yesterday that I was lying down on my bed with a bag of chips and four seasons of One Tree Hill. But yesterday was in fact two years ago. The sight acknowledges the present, the mind plans the future, but the heart and our memories expound on the past.
The curtain was supposed to fall 5 hours ago. But as I lie down on that crease-free bedsheets, my heart twitched at a sudden thought of heartbreaks. There were no events which triggered the idea to walk down this path at possibly the worst time one could think of. As I reminisce on the 4 years (as I only watched four seasons of OTH), I couldn’t help but look at the collective memories and collages on the net.
The pace of society is now such that reminiscent is a privileged past time. We no longer delight at the present like a walk in the park. I digress. Just looking at a picture of Brooke crying sent chills down my spine. Any OTH fan would smile in consensus too. In fact, any true fan would happily agree to sit down and talk for hours through a cup of coffee.
Alice and I met in a store opening about five months ago and from strangers, we create a fairytale of our own. From the courageous period of courtship to the surreal moments of creating memories, Alice and I became from total strangers to inseparable. Literally inseparable.
But life, the reality of falling in love suddenly became formidable. That’s the beauty of watching dramas. One Tree Hill as real as it seem – sending tears rolling down and making our hearts melt and fond – is in our control. When emotions explode to the point we cannot handle, the remote control is just 2 or 3 feet away. The beauty and the perfect justification for watching One Tree Hill. Deep down in our hearts, we know the unmerciful nature of life, and therefore live in the soul of these characters.
We cried as if we were dumped when Brooke Davis was left by Lucas. We sat on our sofas, apathetic with no tears left to cry. when we are caught between the complexity of their lives all intertwined in a web. It was a temporary escapism but compared to sports, games or music, one tree hill is a more sophisticated replica of life. It is relevant and yet seem personal.
Though we are optimistic about our dreams and ambitions, we are somehow pessimistic about finding true love. Perhaps the heartbreaks or the thought of one would be too devastating to handle. The mental aggravation it seems to both male and female to be unimaginably horrific. But as I found my Alice and decided to walk this short span of 50 years together, the present and the future seem brighter and too dear to be spent biting our nails about petty things. But yet the unimaginable or impossible became a reality and heartbreaks hold a small probability.
Don't they?
But as I vent my fears. The quote from Lucas will always be my comfort to counter the beautiful art by Peyton Sawyer. Because deep in my heart, the fearful child is just a reminder. Alice is a fateful partner. Though no fortune tellers can affirm, my heart has never doubted or flicked: on the day I saw her, the day I proposed, and the everyday I spent with her.
I’ll end this night with the comforting words of the Ol’ William Shakespeare, Sonnet 116:
Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds
Or bends with the remover to remove
O No! It is an ever fixed mark
That looks on tempests
And is never shaken
Sincerely,
Noah
Escapism On Noah's Bed 
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